5/21/2009 03:30:00 PM
I'm not an expert on this stuff, but here's what I know (or looked up on the intarwebs):
At 1:52AM on May 12, 1984 a T-800 terminator - designed by Cyberdyne Systems, the inventors of the
Nine minutes later Kyle Reese arrives from the future to protect Sarah. Madness (and depending on who you ask, hilarity) ensues.
Somewhere in the mix there is a whole lot of explosions, robots killing humans, robots killing other robots, questions of robotic life (can a robot really die?), more explosions, and we get an extremely warped sense of time travel and paradox. Skynet has already determined that the human race should be terminated, hence the robots going nuts with giant machine guns, although Skynet technically doesn't even go online until 1997. Figure that one out.
The T-800 Model 101 is a humanoid robot, designed to look exactly like the current governor of the state of California, and wears his sunglasses at night (though as I understand this robot has no ability to sing, and therefore will never get to see his autobiographical hit single reach #7 on the US Billboard Hot 100). He also carries a lot of guns, is really mean, and has a software bug that allows them to feel sympathy for humans if they're off fighting for too long. Supposedly that's a bad thing.
In Los Angeles in 2029, the same year that John Connor sends Kyle Reese back in time, and the same year that Skynet sent a T-800 back in time to kill his mom, another robot, the T-1000 is sent back to the year 1995 to kill a young John Connor. How exactly John Connor knew that Skynet would be trying to kill both his mother and himself at the same time in different years is completely beyond me, but get this: he sends a reprogrammed T-800 back to 1995 to protect him.
The T-1000 is the most incredibly awesome invention ever: a humanoid robot that can transform into..... wait for it.... wait.... LIQUID METAL. And as we all know, the only way to kill a robot made of LIQUID METAL is to heat it up in excess of 1535 degrees Celsius, hit it with a plasma cannon, or pour corrosive hydrochloric acid on it (what? you didn't know that? sheeeesh).
This section is empty because I didn't see T3. I heard it wasn't all that good and felt like my 10 bucks was better spent that weekend seeing some other movie. I'm not really sure that was the right decision.
Tomorrow we'll get to find out the next piece of this strange puzzle, with the release of Terminator Salvation. I don't know about you, but I'm pretty excited. Here's me with a terminator from the new movie:
Yeah, I'm awesome like that. But not quite as awesome as LIQUID METAL.
I should probably mention the wizards behind all of this: Stan Winston Studios designed and built all of the robots from every Terminator movie. If you haven't already, please go read more about them. They are the best in the business.